Archive for February, 2012

Opportunity Knocks

by on Saturday, February 11th, 2012

Funny thing, standing in the abyss.  It is a place where you are open to the world changing and opportunities abound.  Once you have connected with the universe on this level The Universe responds sending you exactly what you need, perhaps not what you thought you were looking for.

Yes, opportunity has indeed come knocking on my door.  Today I am writing a resume for city planners to see my qualifications to run a non-profit art and music center.  My partner the artist is writing hers and a business plan for our center.  It will be interesting to see how well the universe supports this idea.  I’ve come full circle with this idea.  I presented the idea first to artist friends 3 years ago.  The idea was to connect art and music classes in a central location where we could have a recital hall and gallery sharing the space. The timing was terrible on many levels, not the least of which was the failing economy.  Now my friend is ready to make this happen in her life and is making things happen now and today.  And perhaps now is the time since the economy is recovering and money is starting to flow to the marketplace again.  Perhaps now is the time because most music and arts businesses have gone under in the last couple years.  Maybe now people can begin spending on art and music lessons again.  Maybe  the universe is ready.

As I am looking at qualities  of hers that I think are good qualities to get this project rolling, I am also forced to look at qualities of my own that will be good for a center of this magnitude.  Know thyself.

Objectively, I know I am a good communicator.  I am really good with children because it is easy for me to play and have a good time.  I am very organized and am a planner.  I have built up a base of support and connections in the community that will make some of this easier for me.  I never operate under false pretenses. I am honest.

My weaknesses, well the biggest one is that I tend to belittle my accomplishments.  Tend is not the right word, because the problem is bigger than that.  I really undervalue myself on many levels.

Today, I will not go there though.   Today I am a smart accomplished business woman who has a great idea to sell.

Let’s go girl!  Sell it!

Still on the Path

by on Wednesday, February 1st, 2012

Second guessing myself today in every way.  I feel like I’m on the brink of something big, standing on the edge of the abyss and I’m unable to make any sense of myself.  I’m feeling very self centered and selfish, this blog for example is a prime example of narcissism, and want to make changes but can’t figure out what’s wrong.  I am a vessel filled with knowledge of everything artistic, and yet I am good at nothing. I need guidance, direction, a light to point me towards the destination. I have been writing here and in notebooks all over the house, trying to make sense of my thoughts.  Trying to organize my life on some level. I function so much better when I feel organized and the last 4 days or so I’ve been in a confused disorganized and blithering daze.

Not liking this blog, for many reasons.  It is as disorganized as I am.  I would love it if I could have a helpful and interesting blog.  I guess the original point was to write to organize my thoughts.  To pull myself along the path of enlightenment, damn what anyone else thinks.  So perhaps, that is what this is.  Just part of the process.  Move along, nothing to see here. It’s just my “process”.

I am on the path too.  Like everyone, and more or less awake to personal effort, personal struggle.  Isn’t that what life is anyway?  We each have a story and a road to follow.  Like snowflakes, we are all different and beautiful.

Imbolc. In preparing for the ceremony tomorrow, I am prepared to ask questions to the goddess.  Pagan new year, birth and beginnings.  It isn’t a one year in numerology by any means, but it feels like time for new beginnings again.  It is a seven year for me.  Add your age plus the year and you get your numerology year.  Seven, if I remember correctly, is religious path.  It would make more sense if it was an eight, or carreer year,  because career issues have shown up for me.  Numerology is not helping. Perhaps the Goddess will help to show me the path again so I will feel less like I am lost.